Carolling With The Captain Too II
by Captain IT
Summary: I'm back again this year to frature up a bunch more of favorite Christmas carols. Grab some eggnog and a yule log and enjoy.Rated T. Chapter 7, the last chapter is now up. My present to the Kimmunity writers.
1. Chapter 1

**Foward: **_Well, here I am, back again to fracture some more Christmas carols. The gang is back to cause more mayhem and destruction. So let's go enjoy._

* * *

**Disclaimer:**_ All characters of Kim Possible are own by Disney and Mr. Bob and Mr. Mark (All I want for Christmas is Shego under my tree guys!) All other characters, vagabonds, thugs, geeks, lawyers, carpitbaggers,scalliwaggs, and any unclaimed Fannie Awards( me want) are property of their repective authors( and they know who they are, so they claim to be) Me no profit, me have fun._

_Celebrity cheap shots are in my crosshairs. The song in this chapter is done to the tune " The Christmas Song " by Mel Torme._

* * *

**KP Christmas song**

Hi everybody! It's your old pal Captain IT again. Bring you another round of you favorite holiday songs done Kim Possible style. I already see that Rufus is scuba diving in the eggnog and that Ron and Drakken are busy watching " The Six Task of Snowman Hank".... for the 15th time. Bonnie and Tara are drunk and hitting on my band and, of course, KT and Anabri are with the tweebs planning an invasion on Santa's workshop and the whole North Pole complex. So while I talk to JA on the complexity on raising a teenage daughter we hope you like this song.

_Drakken's butt roasting from Shego's blast_

_Rufus nipping on Monty's nose_

_Ron is cleaning up after the otters at Smarty Mart_

_And Kim got kick out of the igloo by eskimos_

_Everybody know a self-destruct button hit by a buffoon_

_Make's a exploding lair seem so bright_

_Tweebs are fighting a anaconda over in the Amazons_

_Will make it hard for their parents to sleep tonight_

_You know Dementor loaded up his henchmen_

_Their off to Las Vegas waving bye-bye_

_And Yori is mediating with Sensei_

_To learn how in the world he learn how to fly_

_And so I'm offering this warning to you_

_To villain one to ninety-two_

_Wade's on the Kimmnicator, your on the naughty list_

_Kim and Ron are coming to get you_

* * *

**A/N:**_ It's that time people. No! not time to burn the yule log. It's time for "Flame the Captain". That's right folk. Send in them reviews, old chesse logs or last year fruit cakes ( No! not your relatives) to me and again we thank-you for your support. Happy Hoilday Everybody!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Foward:**_ Oh no! Kim and Shego are at it again. Let's see what they're fighting about this time._

* * *

**Disclaimer:** _Same as in Chapter 1. Song is done to the tune " Oh Chistmas Tree" All other elements in the song are own by their prospective owner. Me no profit, me have fun._

* * *

**Oh Kimmie-Cub**

" Are those two at it again?" said a worried Captain IT. " Last time those two fought here my insurance company raised my premiums twenty-five percent to cover the damage those two left behind."

" She's the one who always starts it." said Kim as she was doubling his fists.

" I may start it princess, but I'll show you how I finish it." said an angry Shego. " Time to fire up the hurt Kimmie."

" Bring it Shego."

" There gos my insurance rates."

( Shego)

_Oh Kimmie-Cub, Oh Kimmie-Cub_

_It's time to get a beating_

_Oh Kimmie-Cub, Oh Kimmie-Cub_

_The concrete you'll be kissing_

_Your cooking sucks, but that's not all_

_You should be cooking in a hospital_

_Oh Kimmie-Cub, Oh Kimmie-Cub_

_Oh come and get your whooping_

"In your dreams Shego." smirked Kim.

_(_ Kim)

_Oh Shego dear, Oh Shego dear_

_It's time to get your smack down_

_Oh Shego dear, Oh Shego dear_

_I'll ( beep)-slap you another round_

_My bubble butt's big, that is true_

_But your's is big, just like Shamu's_

_Oh Shego dear, Oh Shego dear_

_Come get your sixteen styles of kung-fu_

" You talking to me? You talking to me princess?"

" No, I'm talking to the Christmas tree, but that tall green thing has more personally than the tall green thing that wears something from a Osmond Brother's yard sale...every...single..day."

" That's it!...it's on sister!"

" Bring it, jello mold."

Ron was standing next to Captain IT, smiling, as they watched the two women go into battle.

( Ron)

_Oh Captain, my Captain_

_They're going at it again_

_Oh, Captain, my Captain_

_We're going to make a few millions_

_We'll broadcast this live,but that's not all_

_We'll sell the rights to Monday Night RAW_

_Oh,Captain,my Captain_

_Time to go get Wade and his camaras_

* * *

**A/N: **_Here comes " Flame the Captain", here comes " Flame the Captain" coming over your way. That's right folk. Time for some R&R. So send them review or maybe that ugly old tie your uncle Vern got last christmas. And again we thank-you for your support. Happy Holidays everybody. Now I got to make a phone call._

_" Hello?....Mutual of Saginaw Insurance? ...yes,about my house."_


	3. Chapter 3

**Forward:**_ Looks like James has got his Christmas gift a little early this year_

* * *

**Disclaimer:**_Same as in Chapter 1. Song to the tune " Santa Baby" by J. Javis and P. Springer. All other element in this story are own by their propective owners. Me no profit, me have fun_

( KT & Anabri) ' Not for Long Capella!'

_Who let these two back in the house?_

* * *

**Jamesy Baby**

As we join the KP gang and the Kimmunity writers at my place, we find one James T. Possible sitting infront of my fireplace in my big "Lazy Butt" recliner enjoying a cup of eggnog. Me and Kim couldn't help notice how peaceful he looks in front of the fire.

" That's nice of you Captain to let my dad sit in your chair in front of the fireplace." said Kim as she gave me a small hug.

" Think nothing of it Kim. Beside, he looks like a Norman Rockwell painting sitting there." I smiled.

" By the way Kim. Where's your mother?"

" She said she would be out of your guest room soon. She want to change out of her uniform into something nice according to her."

And something nice she did come out wearing.

Anna came out in a satin-felt red dress with white fur trim, sleeveless and strapless, showing off her..errr..Christmas goodies. Nude stocking with the seam down the back on her shapely legs complemented by a pair of 4 inch heel red leather prandas with small silver bells on them.

The cat calls and wolf whistles were coming out of the wood work.

Kim stood there with her eyes and mouth wide open. Will Du looked, blinked twice, and fainted on to my carpit. Ron have his tongue out of his mouth while Rufus was whistling. All of the writers were making a racket and I make one **big **mistake....I open my big mouth.

" Say doc, I was wondering if you could have a look at this problem I have here. You see, I got this pain right here and..."

A foot hit the side of my jaw senting me to the other side of the room into a wall. When I looked up from the floor, Kim was hovering over me pounding her fist, ready to give me the beating of my life.

" THAT'S MY MOM YOUR HITTING ON YOU SLEZZY RAT !"

Anna came over to pull Kim off of me to calm her down.

" It's ok dear. He didn't really mean anything by that. Beside, I like the attention the others are giving me. You know dear, I only have eyes for one person in this room and that is the man I married Kim: your father."

She then sashayed over into the living room where James was. James had a big smile on his face over what he saw infront of him. Anna looked over at me and my band and gave me the word.

" HIT IT CAPTAIN !"

She straddle James in the chair while her sweet voice was singing to him.

_Jamesy baby, slip a micky in my drink, for me_

_I've been an awful bad girl_

_Jamesy baby, and slide down my chimney tonight_

_Jamesy baby, in the back of my covertible too, just you_

_I'll wait in the back for you dear_

_Jamesy baby, and come slip down my chimney tonight_

_Think of all that thrills I've missed_

_Think of the Kimmunity writers that I haven't kissed_

_Next year I could be oh so bad_

_Check me out in your study big dad_

_Boo doo bee doo_

_Jamesy baby, I want Victoria Secert really_

_That's not a lot_

_I've been an naughty doctor all year_

_Jamesy baby, please shimmy down my chimney tonight_

_Jamesy sweetie, there's one thing I really do need , the twins_

_Over to Nana's tonight_

_Jamesy cutie, take me to your North Pole tonight_

_Jamesy baby, I got us a room at the Middleton Inn, and please_

_Sign the register on the line_

_Jamesy baby, oh come on down my chimney tonight_

_Come and check out my ornaments_

_And I'll check out your Christmas tree_

_Love to get you on satin sheets_

_Put another quarter in it for me_

_Boo doo bee doo_

_Jamesy baby, I want to mention one little thing, help me_

_Out of this dress tonight_

_Jamesy baby, slinky down my chimney tonight_

_Scurry down my chimney tonight_

_Meet me down my chimney tonight_

" TMI MOTHER TMI ! " yelled Kim as she was turning a bright red.

" Oh come on now Kim. There nothing wrong with a little seduction on your father."

" IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY MOM?"

James lean towards me " Did you know we conceive Kim in the back seat of Nana Possible's old 1964 Nash Rambler Captain?"

" Really now James. " I said with the biggest smile on my face. " I never knew that... till now."

" You were a tiger that night dear...rrrrroowww!" growled Anna.

" Excuse me for a moment you two love bird." I said.

I then ran out to my utility shed where I just hit the ground doubled-over laughing. All of a sudden I felt two very strong female arms lifting me up and slamming me against my shed. Kim was foaming at the mouth with her eyes as red as her hair. I never knew real fear till now.

" Captain IT..( _breathing hard_ ) ...if you EVER....( _breathing harder _)... tell anybody that I was conceive in the backseat of my grandma Nana's 1964 Nash Rambler...( _breathing more hard)..._ I WILL HAVE GJ HAVE YOU SLEEPING NEXT TO JIMMY HOFFA....YOU GOT THAT?"

" You didn't hear anything from me Kim." I said in fear.

" We didn't hear you too Captain."

" But our sister is loud enough to say it."

Kim turned around in surprised fear to see Jim and Tim with big smiles on there faces.

" And we can't wait to."

" Get this up on our Kim Possible blog tonight." smiled the both of them.

" TWEEEEEEEB !" yelled Kim as she dropped me. Then she grabbed a rock rake out of my shed and started chasing after her brothers.

Shego saw me on the ground when she heard all of the yelling out back. She came over, dusted me off and helped me back on my feet.

" Wow Captain! who blew Kimmie's gasket?"

" Well Shego, you see , there a good story behind it."

" Do tell now Captain."

" Well, you see, it gos like this: Once upon a time.........."

* * *

**A/N: **_Your a mean one... Captain IT. Yes,yes I know. And boy do I ever deserve a " Flame the Captain" this time._

( Kim) " YOU GOT THE RIGHT, YOU TWO-BIT BASS PLAYING RAT."

_Ok,Ok, I'm sorry Kim. Take a chill pill why don't you. Well anyway send in them reviews or a couple of aspirins after what Kim did to me and again we thank-you for your support._

_Kim?....What are you doing with your cousin Joss's branding iron?_

_Why are you looking at me like that?_


	4. Chapter 4

**Forward: **_Ron seem to be a bit of a Scooge and Kim is not impressed_

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Same as in Chapter 1. Tune is done to the song " The Little Dummer Boy" by Katherine K. Davis. Also inspired by a Larry The Cable Guy skit. All other element in the story are own by their propective owners. Me no profit,me have fun._

( Anabri) And stay tune for the next chapter after this when me and the other " Angels" give Captain IT his Chirstmas gift.

( KT) " IT"s not going to be pretty this time...hehehe

_Don't you two have toys to go steal in Whoville?_

* * *

**Ron You're A Bum**

" THAT CHEAP BOYFRIEND OF MINE! " yelled a distraught Kim.

" What's the matter Kim ?" I said looking at her.

" Look what Ron gave me for Christmas Captain. Bueno buck....again."

" You seem to like them last year."

" That was last year. You'd think this year with me being his BFGF he would get me something special like I done for him."

" Hi you two. How is it going? I see you got my present KP." said a smiling Ron.

" I'm not talking to you Ron." huff Kim.

I whispered over to Ron. " She didn't like the bueno buck dude."

"Ohhhh, sorry about that KP." said with a puppy-dog pout look to him.

" Oh that ok my Ronnie." said Kim as she purred up against him.

" I couldn't decide if I should give you the bueno bucks or this new coupon book I got."

I started backing away from the both of them veeeeery quicky.

" RON YOU SKIN-FLINT,TIGHT-WAD, PENNY-PINCHING SCOOGE!"

I stood there and looked at my band for a moment.

"Boys, I believe Kim is going to be singing any second now."

" HIT IT CAPTAIN!"

" And there it is."

_Get a job Ron _

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Money don't grow on trees_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Not waiting for your naco checks_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_You blow them all on Rufus_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Going to burn your coupon book_

_You bum,bum bum,bum_

_Ron,you're a bum_

_You clean up after animals_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Which one left you that present?_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Change that paper before your done_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Look what that elephant did on my shoe_

_You bum,bum,bum bum_

_Bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Clean up over on aisle 10_

_You, bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Ron you're a bum_

_Last night at the restaurant_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_You asked for the kiddie meal_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_You are such a cheap skate_

_You bum,bum,bum,bum_

_And I got dressed up for this deal_

_You bum,bum,_

_Bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Scooge and Jack Benny would be proud of you_

_You ,bum,bum,bum,bum_

_Ron you're a bum_

* * *

**A/N: **_Ok Christmas shoppers. Time once again to play " Flame that Captain" Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!.. I DIDN'T MEAN YOU ANGELS!_

( Neb's Angels): Sorry Captain...( snickering)

_Why me? Why does it have to be me? Anyway send in them reviews and as always we thank-you for your support. Now I got to go take a shower. I smell like sour grapes._


	5. Chapter 5

**Forward: **_The " Angels" are presenting me a Christmas gift. Run for cover everybody._

* * *

**Disclaimer: (** Captain IT tied up with tape over his month):_mmhmhhhmmhmh._

( Anabri) " Oh!, sorry people. Captain IT is tied up for the moment. But he did wanted to tell you that the disclaimer is the same as in Chapter 1 and that he doesn't own any Kim Possible characters. The song in this chapter is done to the tune " Santa Claus Is Watching You" by Ray Stevens. Neb's Angels is own by Thomas Linquist and this idiot we got tied up here. The BE4000 is own by JAKT. Neb and BlazeIT are by cpneb. The authors in the story appear as themselves. And are cute too!"

_mmmhmmhmmhhhmmmhh._

( Akinyi) " Will somebody shut him up?"

( Monique) " Down now baby boy! He also wants to thank all the readers and those who gave him reviews over the last few chapters. Anabri, Sharper1988, Kim's 1 fan,CajunBear73, Thomas Linquist and Sentinel 103."

( KT whispering over to Monique) " Like he really deserves that?"

( Monique) " Better than what we're going to give him girlfriend."

_MMMMHHHHHHMMMHHHHHHHHH !_

( Joss) " Calm down you varmin. This ain't going to hurt......much."

* * *

**Neb's Angels Is Watching You**

" So, how do you like the party so far Thomas?" said Captain IT. Thomas Linquist, a good friend of the Captain, was enjoying himself very well when he notice something out on the front lawn of the Captain's house.

" That an odd looking ornament display you have out front Captain. What do you call that?"

The Captain looked out into the yard and Thomas thought he saw steam coming out of Captain IT's ears.

" Those darn Angels! They TP'd my house again this year. Dang it!" said Captain IT as he kick his mailbox. As Captain IT was hopping around holding his soar foot, Bonnie, Shego, Rufus, Ran H. and a few others were clapping along like he was doing an irish Christmas jig.

" Not funny everybody!" fumed the Captain as he went off limping.

Thomas then walked up to IT and put his arm around his shoulder.

" You know you really should be nice to the Angels. They're not that bad."

" Not that bad? NOT THAT BAD? Last week they egged my car. Two days ago they shaved my dog's butt and taught it to walk backwards."

" Well, you have to admit. That is one ugly dog you have there Captain."

" Oh very funny Thomas. I suppose you want me to go fill their stocking with little goodies too."

" Captain, let me sing to you what's going to happen if you don't start making amends to the Angels."

_Now moron, idiot, dim-wit, crackpot, buffoon_

_You know you better be right_

_And be on your best behavor tonight_

_If you don't then you'll be screwed_

_Cause Neb's Angels is watching you_

( They're everywhere, they're everywhere)

_You better kiss up and make an amends_

_Or your going to get it right in the end_

_That BE4000 will blast you though_

_Cause Neb's Angels is watching you_

( They're everywhere, duck for cover)

_Well you might think your a funny guy_

_And get away with lame jokes_

_But ole Neb is no fool, he's really super cool_

_He's the secret head of the CIA_

_Captain IT, jokes don't paid_

( You can't do nothing and it's not getting better

He's even got Wade spamming up your computer)

_So if you ever do KT and Anabri wrong_

_Break Shego's heart and write Kim cooking songs_

_Come Christmas time, you'll be singing the blues_

_Cause Neb's Angels is watching you_

_(_ Hit the deck, Every man for himself )

Every Christmas season, Neb climbs in his custom red mustang full of goodies

With duel exhaust and CD player, the GPS, naked woman mudflaps

The heated seat covers

And spreads Christmas cheer to all the good Kimmunity people

Then he says " On Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid

Donner and Blitzen and Star-Eva, and Slyrr, Ran and Kwebs,Neo, PRT,

Zaratan, JA, Thomas and Captainkodak,MrDrP, Kittypuppy, Whitem,

Ghostwriter, Sir Sebastian , Jurnee Jakes and Campy...

( Captain IT: " Where's KT and Anabri ?")

They're on a stakeout with Shego and Lis at your house

_Pack your bags,hit the road, but you can't get away_

_They see you watch the Playboy Channel everyday_

_So Captain if you ever do them wrong_

_Write them in a story or even a song_

_When Christmas comes, you'll be black and blue_

_Cause Neb's Angels is watching you_

( BE 4000s at 10:00 o'clock, run for cover)

_Yeah Neb's Angels is watching you_

( Sergeant Friday, Peter Gunn and the Lone Ranger can't help you now)

_Neb's Angels got their eyes all over you_

_Better run for the hills_

_Ooh, look out there's Neb's Angels looking out of some trash cans across the street_

_Shoot, your in deep mole-rat doo_

_You know that?_

_I don't think you know what's going on_

_I got to call the guys at BlazeIT now_

_Them bad ole Angels gonna come down here_

_Whoop up on you_

_I mean you better get yourself right Captain IT_

_Or Neb's Angels are going to get you_

"Ok, I heard you Thomas. I'll be good to them..the day Neb become President of the USA." smirk the Captain. " I better go see what that noise is on the other side of the house.'

" NO!, don't go over there Captain. The Angels are target practicing with snowballs."

" Fire Angels !" yelled Joss Possible as the Angels started firing.

A barrage of grape-scented snowballs from six BE4000s started to plummed on Captain IT.

The snow covered the complete frame of the Captain as the Angels raced up to him and start to put coal where his eyes were, a carrot stick on his nose, three pieces of coal for shirt buttons, a top hat on his head and a corncob pipe in his mouth.

The Angels and Thomas then stood in front of the makeshift snow man for a picture.

" Merry Christmas everybody!" said the Angels and Thomas as they were waving for the camara.

Inside the snowman you can hear a Yosemite Sam like voice coming out of it.

" OOOOOOOOOOH, I HATE THEM ANGELS !"

* * *

**A/N: **_( Whispering) Oh, Hi everybody! I'm hiding out from the Angels in old camouflage german pill-box bunker I bought last year. Yes time once now for " Flame that Captain". And no, not like the Angels will do to me..oh,oh. shhh!_

( Joss) " Y'all heard something?"

( Neo) " He's got to be hiding around here somewhere"

( Anabri) " He's going to get more than another make-over when we're finish with him"

_Glup!... errr..looks like I'm going to have to make my escape soon. So hurry and sent in the reviews or some chocolate bars to distract them. And again we thank-you for your support. Happy Holidays everybody. Now, where did I put that escape pod I bought from Drakken? Oh, there it is. Ewww, he didn't clean the trash out of it._


	6. Chapter 6

**Foward: **_What is Christmas without Monkeyfist in the mix? Stay tune and find out._

* * *

**Disclaimer:** ( Captain IT opens a letter) _Oh look! a Christmas card from Anabri and KT. How very nice. It says " Captain IT does not own Kim Possible or any characters in this story. Just himself. And that's just sad. He no profit,he have fun. Celebrity cheap shots are in his crosshairs. The song in this story is done to the tune " Your a mean one, Mr. Grinch" by Dr. Seuss. Merry Christmas Captain. This card will self-destruct in three second."_

BOOM!

_I'm sooo going to get them two. Hmm,was that a tooth?_

* * *

**Your A Mean One, Mr. Fisk**

" This party is so droll" said a displeased Monkeyfist. " A orangutan can cater better."

" Well sorry I don't have tea and crumpets for you Monty. Want a banana?" smiled Captain IT.

" You call yourself a host of this disastrous get together?"

" Hea! don't make me come over there with my sister Monkeyfist." said a mad Ron.

" You just keep that brat away from me. I'm still feeling the pain from when she last threw me."

" I got a song just for you Monty." said Kim Possible.

" Did you ever have the feeling you got another song to do Captain?" smiled Shego.

" One more time boys."

_You're a mean one, Mr. Fisk_

_You have banana breath_

_You're as admiring as the Black Plague_

_You're as charming as Donald Trump_

_Mr. Fisk_

Your just as bad as

_Somebody who didn't clean your litter box_

_You're a baboon, Mr. Fisk_

_Your Darwin's missing link_

_When was the last you change your gi_

_Boy! I bet it really stink_

_Mr. Fisk_

I wouldn't touch you, with

_Cousin Larry tied to a nine foot pole_

_You're really grouchy,Mr Fisk_

_You're really out of luck_

_You have trouble fight Ron_

_No wonder he can kick your butt_

_Mr. Fisk_

Given the choice between the two of you

_I'll take Ron, odds 10 to 1_

_You make me upchuck, Mr. Fisk_

_Your messy hair just will not do_

_You got bugs between your teeth_

_I'm glad you don't sling your poo_

_Mr. Fisk_

The three words that decribe that action

are, and I quote: " THAT'S, SO, GROSS."

_You're a stuck-up, Mr. Fisk _

_You're nothing but a pompous a**_

_Your as dignified as a hillbilly_

_You really have no class_

_Mr. Fisk_

You expect me to believe that

a small, poopy-diapered,spitting-up

kung-fu brat kick you hairy butt and

_threw you next to a volcano_

* * *

**A/N: **_Now if I just connect this wire here my bomb present will be done. Those two will never know what hit them. Oh! hi everybody. Guess it is time now to " Flame the Captain". Right now I'm planning a little flaming on my own on a couple of brats. So while I'm with the wire works here you good people go ahead and send in those reviews and again we thank-you for your support._

( KT and Anabri very loudly) HI CAPTAIN!

**BOOM!!!!!!**

( Anabri) You think it was a good idea to sneak up to him like that?

( KT) Naaa! it's ok. He like it. Hehehe.

_Mother told me there would be days like these._


	7. Chapter 7

**Forward:** _Here is the last chapter now. My Christmas gift to all my readers and to the Kimmunity._

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Same as in the other chapters_

_Say you two, do you know what a cat gets when it walks on a beach?_

( KT and Anabri) " No Captain, what does it get?"

_Sandy Claws..get it?,,yuk..yuk yuk._

( Anabri) " Shall we just shoot him now or put him out of our misery later?"

( KT) " Naa, let's just send him to the bunker work-out room and let Kim kick him around a few times."

_Shee! nobody like a good joke. The story in the chapter is from the story "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore._

* * *

Well everybody, so ends another "Carolling With The Captain" for this year. The gang around here is already starting to crash around now. All except for Hana, who running around my ceiling.

" Who carbo-loaded my sister?"

"She kept getting into the cookies all night Ron."

" He,he, my bad, guess I should have watched her."

And if that wasn't bad enough, Drew's mom got snonkered and dance with me........4 TIMES!!!!

" So what's wrong with that Captain? My mother dances with everybody."

"She pinch me Drew."

" Big deal. My mother pinches me all the time. You don't see me crying."

"On my tookus Drew."

Both Kim And Shego spitted out their eggnog.

" TMI Captain, I didn't need to hear that." said a discussed Shego.

" EWWWW!" said Kim turning the same color as Shego.

"At lease you two are not going to be having the nightmare tonight."

For the last chapter I decided to tell an old classis Christmas story " Twas The Night Before Christmas"...but with a new twist to it. Now it's called:

**" Twas The Night At The Captain's"**

Twas the night before Christmas and all though my place.

All the Kimmunity writers came over, even that freeloader, Mace.

Kwebs,Ran,and Mike were DJing the songs

That cause the neighbors to call the cops on me I thought,"What else could go wrong?"

Neb's angels looked deadly,threw them chocolate without a second guess.

All six would start at the same time...The vicious P.M.S.

When outside in the sky there was a loud yell.

I ran out into the yard sceaming," What in the hell?"

And there on my house the damage was done.

Neb flew into my roof in the Blaze_IT_ 1.

" Your going to pay for that Neb!" but my yell didn't get far.

Mace done threw Neo though the roof of my car.

Whitem got drunk,threw up in my fire place.

Anabri came out of nowhere and put lipstick on my face.

But what to my wondering eye appear.

Cheerleaders in my bedroom slapping their...err...let me get back to you on that.

On my best satin sheets,They were partying on.

And Rufus was their pimp, now you know that's just wrong.

He wore a purple pimp hat, and if that wasn't a find how do you do.

He was in my recliner watching 'Kigo does Kalamazoo' on my pay per view.

And in my bathroom was a sight to behold.

Z in my jacuzzi with Bonnie, now that was bold.

I asked him," What in the world are you doing in my tub?"

He answered,"Showing Bonnie my version of Rub-a-dub-dub."

And in my shower stall was Kim, Ron, and Shego.

By the grin on his face he had a boost to his ego.

And I did ask the three " What are you doing in there?"

" We're filming a new Kigo movie and it's about to go on the air...'boo' and a 'yah' "

So I went and called the cops, you bet I did the work.

Luci screamed " WE'RE ARRESTED?" Ya I know.I'm a jerk.

So the cops did come, hauled them off the the county jail.

For public drunkness, flying with a expired license plate, postitution, $300.000 bail.

But I heard them exclaim as I filled out the police report.

"We're going to get Hank Perkins and sue your a** in court."

And that it ladies and gentlemen. I want to thank everybody for reading this and to my fans around the world Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Happy Kwanzaa, Buon Natale, Ferliz Navidad, Joyeux Noel, Frohe Weilnachten, and Season Greeting. I also want to sent out a Happy Hoildays greeting to all the writers in the Kimmunity who have been like a second family to me. You are what helps keep " Carolling with the Captain" going.

And let us not forget the men and women of are Arm Forces that cannot be home for Christmas this year. I now have a son-in-law in the sevice that will not be home this year to celebrate with us. I pray that he will be home next Christmas to see his new "daughter" sitting next to the Christmas tree here. Let us all keep them in our prayers this year.

That's all now everybody. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from the Captain that makes IT happen.

Your friend Robert ( Captain IT)

And again we thank-you for your support.


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